It’s the Independence Day holiday here – celebrate!
Holiday Celebration
Category Archives: Caring for yourself
Checking in
So, it’s about the middle of the year (already!) –
how are you coming on your goals? Give them the tune-up they probably need…and keep moving toward them!
Preparing to go to Camp!
Many of us get to spend at least part of our summer participating in Harp activities. We have discussed some of them here. I think we all really look forward to the excitement of seeing old friends, meeting new people, playing together and more.
But one of the biggest challenges for us is to be fully prepared. We spend our precious free time and our money to go so it is really important that we be prepared to get as much from each event as we can. Here are five ideas to help you get more from your harp activities:
1. Increase your daily practice time – even a weekend workshop has a lot more playing time that your average practice session. Summer always seems to sneak up on us – so start increasing your practice time from now so you won’t have to ramp up quickly and get hurt.
2. Increase your stretching – as much fun and as fatiguing as these activities are they still involve a lot of sitting – at the harp, at meals, while chatting. So start increasing the amount of time you stretch each day – that way you will have developed the habit before you need it at a workshop.
3. Increase your listening – many of the folk harp events have an emphasis on the oral tradition and learning by ear. Learning this way takes practice so don’t let your hard earned ability to learn languish in the winter – practice learning by ear from cds or other people playing.
4. Take care of yourself – start now getting enough sleep, eating carefully and taking some exercise so you have the stamina to get through the long days of harp activities.
5. Have a plan – before you even get to the venue have a good idea what you would like to learn and how you will go about acquiring that knowledge. Do not wait until you arrive to select the workshops you’d like to attend or even to find out who’s teaching. Know what you came for.
There’s so much to learn, with a little time and effort now by the time the summer season kicks off, you’ll be more than ready!
Whisper down the shout
Sandy Grason said, “Your inner wisdom whispers, your inner critic SHOUTS” (my emphasis). It has been my experience that she is correct.
Especially when it comes to our music. We know a large number of people who play better than we do. And if we are adults who came to the harp in adulthood, many of them are still children!
Unfortunately, we let that shouting inner critic get in our way. We can’t even discern the whispering wisdom – we are too caught up in swooning to the poison of the critic. We focus on every “mistake”, every “failure”, every variance. We note how the “real” harpers never make mistakes, have stunning repertoires, and can play any tune.
It is too bad that we are so focused on ourselves. We typically are so caught up in our fear that someone else will be better than us that we don’t really listen to those that we idolize. We don’t recognize that the “real” harpers:
- make mistakes when playing
- are learning tunes
- are sometimes chagrined when they are not having a good day (my experience has been that this is especially highlighted when teaching!)
- may also be feeling this same way – and with much more at stake!
So, if you find that you are listening to the stupid shouting rather than the wise whispering you can take action to change. There are only a few things you must do:
- Pretend the critic is talking about your friend, mother, spouse – wouldn’t you tell that critic to stop and start listing all the reasons they are wrong? Of course you would! The critic only has the power you grant – therefore if you defend yourself vigorously, the critic will recede.
- Do not compare yourself to others – only to yourself. I suggest that my students make a recording annually (usually at the New Year). The idea is to record what they are doing at that point in time – playing whatever they happen to be working on. They periodically go back and listen to the recording in its entirety so they can hear for themselves how much they have improved. They can compare themselves to their previous performance – the only comparison that matters!
- Listen to others – I guarantee you that only the meanest of people would seek you out to deliver a cutting critique. When people hear you play and tell you how much they enjoyed your playing, when a respected teacher tells you what a good job you’ve done, when someone asks you to play – they are being honest!!! Believe them and enjoy knowing you’ve done well.
Listen carefully – and the whisper will grow louder!
Its winter – go play inside!
It is easy to get the winter blahs – the sun comes up late, it sets early. When you go out you have to bundle up – which makes the sun have a harder time getting to you to help block the blahs. But we have a secret (or not really secret) weapon – you can use your harp to help keep those blahs at bay.
We already know that music can facilitate healing – physical and mental. There are research studies indicating that live music directly impacts healing. What could be better than playing to yourself? You can’t help but be there so be present when you’re playing, concentrate on the vibration on your shoulder, the tone, and the just having fun part of playing!
So, sit by a window, play music you enjoy, revel in the tone, the feel of your harp, and sheer enjoyment of playing the music – and feel the blahs retreat…hopefully until spring!
Happy Christmas…to YOU!
It’s that time of year – the run up to the holidays. Everyone is stressed! If you are like most people you are way behind in your shopping, your decorating, your baking, and possibly running short of good will toward your fellow man.
In the midst of what is, for most people certainly, chaos, it is important for you to take a little time for yourself. Do something you enjoy. Breathe.
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| Why don’t I feel like that? |
If you’re reading this, it is likely that you find playing your harp to be a great way to take some time for yourself…as long as you are not preparing for a gig or struggling to play a piece of music you find challenging. This is a great time to play those Christmas carols you love, the tunes you know really solidly, and to indulge in the simple pleasures of the easy tunes (Twinkle, anyone?).
Take some time to remind yourself why you play. Use it as a time to fall in love with your harp again (especially if the two of you haven’t been seeing eye to eye when your stress level has increased!). Play barefoot to let the vibration tickle your feet! Just play with your harp – and enjoy.
And if what is best for you is to take a little time away from your harp – do that. Read a book, take a walk, bake come cookies. Do something you enjoy just for the joy of it – to help refresh yourself. You know the new year will bring new goals and challenges – so take a breather now!
Somedays, it feels like you’ll never get up!
Some days, the time is fluid, the needful things all seem to be complete and there’s your harp, all ready to be played. But other days are like the third day of a diet – you know, the day you start to backslide, cheat, eat M&Ms because they’re small and they don’t count.
Those are the days on which your life gangs up on you – there’s so much to do and no matter how hard you work, you don’t get the needful things completed, the only thing that changes on your “Things to Do” list is that it keeps getting longer, and when you fall exhaustedly into bead, you jolt awake with the thought, “oh, [bother], I never practiced today!” And, because you’re exhausted, as you slide into sleep, you feel guilty and just a little fatter (well, the harp equivalent).
H.G. Wells is quoted as saying, “If you fell down yesterday, stand up today.” He’s got a good point. We all know we must practice to maintain our hard won gains (and so as not to embarrass ourselves when someone asks us to play an impromptu concert). But we also know that we live in the world and stuff happens.
On those days (which do sometimes stretch into weeks) be kind to yourself. If your harp buddy was confessing that practice was a word he could no longer even spell, would you start castigating him? If your workshop roomie let slip that she’s kind of in a hiatus from actually practicing, would you read her the riot act? No, you wouldn’t do either of those things. You would express kind hearted support – you’d try to make them feel better – after all, things come up.
So, don’t do that to yourself either. Recognize that harp, like everything else in your life, is clamoring for your attention. Recognize that because you love your harp so much you might actually favor it over other things on the good days (cleaning would be one of those things!) so you feel keenly the not good days when you don’t get to play.
Make a promise to yourself to be gentle with you, praise your good, and accept that less good. Know that sometimes you need a little break to return to your love affair with a light heart.
And aren’t we lucky – the loves of our lives sit there, patiently waiting, going out of tune (this must be the harp equivalent of when your dog chews your shoes to express displeasure!). So, when things calm down, go back, play the old, well worn, easy stuff that you don’t forget and the next day, take on a challenge!
Just ‘cause you fell down today doesn’t mean that tomorrow won’t be better and you can get right up…onto your harp bench!
What does your space look like?
What does the space in which you practice look like? Is it warm and inviting, beckoning you to come play? Or does it look the bigger cousin of the kitchen junk drawer?
What you put around you impacts your time at the harp. And since none of us has enough time at the harp, we need to make sure our surroundings help us maximise that time rather than gnawing on our conscious or our unconscious thought.
No matter whether you have an entire wing of your house devoted to enshrining your harp or if you have your harp wedged into a corner, you should make sure that your surroundings help you play, practice, grow, and enjoy.
So, here are four things you can do to improve your space so that you enjoy being there more and get better performance from yourself while you are there.
1. Make the space inviting and comfortable. This is clearly personal and you should make the space yours. There are number of things that can make the space better for you. Make sure you have good lighting. Have enough space to safely play and store your harp. Will the dog run through and knock it over? Do you have enough room for your bench. If you have a small space, be sure you have enough room for good form and technique throughout the range of the harp (when you play the top strings, are your elbows brushing the walls? Then move!). You may have to move the furniture around (but since its not a harp, I’m sure no one will notice or care!).
2. Have on hand the things you will need – eventually. You know you need a tuner and lighting and space for your harp. But there are other things you need to store nearby as well – music? music stand? extra strings? a string chart? whatever other bits and bobs you want to have there. Make sure those things are easily accessible so you have them when you need them. For instance, if a string breaks during your practice, it might not be enough to have the strings close by, you might also need string ends, candle gum, pliers, et autre accoutrement.
3. Of course having things near by means your must have a place to put those things. And that you actually put them in their place when not in use! Organizing your things will keep the space tidy so it won’t be a distraction while you’re practicing.
4. Use the space you have to do the things you do. If you don’t just play but also have people listen, you’ll need a comfortable place for them to sit. If you do a lot of arranging, you’ll need a place for your pens and pencils, manuscript paper, erasers (if you’re at all like me!). If you do recording, you’ll need the recorder itself and a stand or table.
Each of us uses our harps and the space in a very personal way. Make sure you organize your space so you can accomplish all you want to without having to “fight” the room to make your accomplishments.
Self-Care
Winter is a time of colder temperatures with brisk, dry winds, and rain, ice, snow and combinations of all of them. I’m sure you don’t need a weather report from me. We all have to get through the winter season where we live. The winter does bring some challenges for us as harp players. We have to take self-care seriously to assure we don’t get hurt. Here are two areas that will help you get through the winter successfully.
Start with the skin. Your skin is the largest organ in your body. It protects you from a lot including your harp – and other, bad stuff. It is your first line of defense. It protects you from disease. It is sturdy but delicate. You need to give it appropriate care. Being sure to wash your hands frequently is good for your health. But putting moisturizer on frequently is really good for your skin. Just like we get thirsty in winter because cold air and heating systems dry the air, our skin is also thirsty. Moisturizer will help keep your skin supple. A shea butter, cocoa butter, aloe vera or other moisturizer you know works for you is good to have on hand all the time.Moving on to your hands – keep them warm – physically. Wear your gloves or wristies* There are lots of free patterns online if you want to knit your own or you can buy inexpensive versions in knits or fleece. They are very helpful, even in warm weather, for keeping warm before performances.
While I always tell you the importance of warming up, in the winter it is essential to warm up before you play. Just like the rest of you feels the cold, your hands and forearms and their muscles will feel the cold. And if you are a more experienced human (read: older) you may feel the cold even more keenly. So that warm up to start your practice is even more important than at other, warmer parts of the year. In addition, consider adding a warm up to your office work in winter. Typing, writing, and other small motor activities (think texting) can also take a toll on your hands so think about warming up for those as well.
I’m also partial to holding a good cup of hot tea!
*”Wristies” is a patented and trademarked item, developed, according to the website, by a smart and enterprising 10 year old Girl Scout! Not an endorsement – I’ve never worn Wristies ™ but I like the idea and the story. Here I am suggesting any sort of fingerless warmer that helps you preserve your muscle warmth).
And now, the Rest of the story
We’re working our way through the holiday season. There are things to do, gifts to wrap, gigs to play, cookies to bake, parties to attend, and we haven’t even gotten to New Year yet – yikes! You know what you need to do throughout all this, especially if you’re going to play your best – REST!
What does rest mean? For some it will mean take a week off. Don’t play, don’t think about playing, don’t do any goal setting or planning (bet you never thought you’d hear me say that). Just Rest. Maybe have a professional manicure or a massage to help care for your hands and their little muscles. Take a little “me” time for your harp too – you could have your harp regulated or change the strings if they need it. I’m happy to recommend my favorite local luthier if you don’t have one (just send me a comment and I’ll share that with you).
We all know the importance of rest, even if we ignore it. Rest helps us recharge. It helps us get some distance from what we normally do – our everyday lives. And rest encourages us to return to our harps with a fresh perspective gained from missing our heart throb.
Use your rest time well. Schedule it when it is best for you. Now is a good time because we’ve been playing a lot, but you may have another time that is better for you, maybe at the end of the flurry of summer learning experiences when you have a lot in your head? Then the rest gives you a chance to sort through what you’ve learned and determine what to keep, what to shelve to work on later, and what was a good learning experience but not something you need to keep.
You can use your rest time to do other things – talk to your family members or read a book. Remember that these pursuits can also improve your playing by helping to broaden your perspective (and to rekindle relationships you’ve left slide while practicing – are those your children?!?!)
A little rest will do you good. And when you’ve finished resting you’ll be refreshed and ready to get back in, work hard and improve your playing.