This week I’m at the Ohio Scottish Arts School, but I still wanted to have a moment to catch up with you! The great thing about going to OSAS is what I learn. I have the pleasure of being a teacher but this year we have 32 students and I am excited to find out what I will be learning from each of them! Of course, all that learning can lead to self-inflicted feedback!

When was the last time that you played something, were truly happy with it, and then celebrated your success? Sadly, some of you (if you’re being honest) are saying, “never”. Hopefully you’re not one of those. Because celebrating successes is important.

Unfortunately, even when we are doing well, we are quick to let our inner critic have the floor. We discount our good work and highlight our mistakes. We provide ourselves with self-inflicted feedback! Have you ever heard yourself say these things to yourself:

– Well, it was good, but I messed up the entry of the third tune.

– I played it so much better at home

– It wasn’t perfect

Or some variation thereof?

While it might feel like you’re helping yourself, mostly you’re just beating yourself up. The downside to beating yourself up is that it does nothing to help you grow. It just draws your attention to flaws but with too much focus.

How can you fix this? “Reframing” is all the rage just now. If you’re not jumbled up in the lingo, reframing simply means looking at things from a different perspective to give you access to potential new solutions. The best things about reframing are that it’s easy and it’s helpful!

You could reasonably wonder why you might need reframing. Maybe you don’t, but statistically, it’s more likely you do. Because reframing is a great tool for calibrating your self-talk.

Your inner critic might have a point – but only if it “moves the needle” for you and gives you a way to improve. So, the next time you start telling yourself that you could do better I’d urge you to reframe your thinking.

An easy way to get started is to “reframe” your feedback through the lens, “how would I tell a good friend this input?”. You’d never tell your friend they weren’t doing well enough. You’d be encouraging. You’d be supportive. You might provide suggested paths forward, but you wouldn’t suggest that your friend would get lost on the path you’ve suggested!

So, the next time your “critic” provides “feedback”, do yourself a favor and run it through your friend filter. It will help you reframe both your thinking and your feedback and position you to learn from yourself!

And if you find that your inner critic is running roughshod over you, you can always ask, “Who asked you?”

When you feel your inner critic rising, give this reframing a try – and let me know what you think of the approach. Let me know what you think!