Category Archives: Caring for yourself

Holidays are coming up!

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Those people who are planners will note that it’s about time to start getting ready for the Holiday season. Since the retailers have decided that Labor Day is when Christmas stuff comes out, we should probably take a hint. The holiday season is a time that you can expect to be asked to play. If people know you play the harp, you’re going to be asked (If you haven’t told your immediate family that you’ve taken up the harp, you need to come clean!).

Whether you will play for your dog, your family, or parties and other gigs, you need a plan that will allow you to get through the season of holidays with minimal stress – and still leave time for your shopping.

Here are a six things you can do to be prepared:

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  1. Make a list – what tunes are you going to play? What have you played in previous years (these will come back quickly)? What did you have requests for last year that you need to learn?
  2. Get out your calendar 1 – when are you available? When do you have other obligations?
  3. Decorate – what will you wear for your gigs (even if its your dog, think of it as a gig)? Can you actually play in that outfit? If you’re pulling out your annual holiday outfit, a year is plenty of time to shed, find or redistribute weight – does it still work for you? .
  4. Get out your calendar 2 – when are you going to practice? When will you be too busy to fit in time? Where does that fall relative to your obligations to play?
  5. Get it together – do you have any music or notes you need pulled together? Are they attractive or do you still have a collection of stickies and scraps of paper?
  6. Breathe – do you have enough time to do all the other things you might do for the holidays (such as baking, visiting friends, wrapping gifts, etc.)?

Get started now so you can have a relaxed enjoyable holiday season – you’ll be glad you did!

The Dr. Is In

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Dr. Seuss is quoted as saying,

“It’s not about what it is, it’s about what it can become.”

What a great way to look at playing. We have to remember that even when we play our best, we can only play our best for this day…and tomorrow will be another, different day on which we may play very differently.

Which means that each day, when we work at playing, we have the opportunity to play well, or to learn from our playing or both. We also can learn so much that may (or may not) be directly tied to our harp playing.

Some days it feels like you aren’t getting anywhere. Other days, you make so much progress you wonder why you ever doubted. And, of course, you have a day each time you practice. So why is it that you only remember the days in which you had trouble? You only recall the “bad” days!Picture1To avoid falling down in the dumps about these bad days, keep a log. Each day write down what you did, what when right, what gave you some difficulty. You might want to develop a scheme for finding the good days (color the top corner green, fold the page over on the diagonal, keep good days at the front right side up and bad days at the back upside down) so you can remind yourself that you’re doing a great job and what you continue to struggle with.

Because you know that there will always be some things that are a struggle…but they don’t define you! Just keep in mind what the good Dr. said.

Time to tune up

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In the summer, there are so many camps, workshops, programs and they all suggest that you start early to get your fingers toughened up because you’ll be playing more than you usually do.

GREAT SUGGESTION!

But what does that mean? How can you get ready for these events? Here are seven ways to tune up for a workshop so you can get as much out of the last session as the first: Picture1

  1. Make a schedule – you know you have a finite amount of time to prepare, so plan to use it – each day increase your time on the bench a little (add no more than 10% each week – just like running).  A small increase allows you to build up without adding too much at once, which will help you stay on track). Be sure in also increase the number of times each day that you sit at your harp – the workshop might be 8 hours a day but that won’t all be on your bench so you might want to practice sitting to your harp 3 times a day rather than one really long stretch!
  2. Work your plan – it’s all well and good to make a plan but then you have to actually use it! Be sure that you actually do the things you set up in your plan
  3. Be realistic – if you never have time to practice on Sundays (for example) – build that into your plan, don’t think that suddenly the time will appear. This is especially true if you are working around your current schedule – if you only have 30 minutes a day to practice, do not think that suddenly you will find 3 hours a day to practice.  However, if you are so strapped for time that you can only practice for 30 minutes a day – know that you will need to modify what you expect to get out of each day of the workshop.
  4. Remember your braces: when you had braces, you didn’t expect all the movement at once – it was gentle progress you were after – same thing here – gentle positive progress will not only allow you to feel better about your work but will result in a noticeable benefit.
  5. Warm up – this is not the time to skimp on the fundamentals – do plan to spend a little time warming up (and when you get to your workshop, don’t forget to do this!)
  6. Stretch – just as you know that a good warm up is essential to avoiding injury, a good stretch at the end of your time at your harp is also important while you are increasing your time on the bench. And when you are at your workshop, stretching will also be important – you will be working hard.  In addition, workshop participants are often a little stressed (concentrating, wanting to “do well” (whatever that means – everyone is learning!), trying to learn a lot in a little time with the tutor all add to your stress).
  7. Journal – keep a record of what you are doing and how it is going – while this is always a good idea, it’s especially important when you are trying to prepare.

Summer workshops, camps, and other events are a great way to learn, meet new friends, catch up with old friends and really expand your harping – be sure you are ready to make the most of the event!

Don’t confuse your bloopers with everyone else’s highlights –

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I saw this quote a while ago and it grabbed my attention.  It really points out an activity many of us do – often without thinking or questioning.

You’ve been there – you are performing – at Carnegie Hall, at a local festival, in your church, for your cat – and you make a “unintended jazz improvisation”, an out of mode musical variation, an exciting opportunity to explore the entirety of the scale, a mistake!

In your head this diversion is accompanied by a cymbal clash, a thunderclap, and an accusatory glare from everyone within earshot.  You replay it in your head in a heart wrenching loop – you focus all your energy in reliving the moment. You play it in slo-mo.  You play it over and over and over.  You reconfirm all your fears that you are not a good harp player.

Picture1But then you make the real mistake – you point out to yourself that (insert your Harp Hero here) never makes those errors.  Your Harp Hero is perfect – you have never heard a wrong note emerge from HH’s harp!  It is not possible!

The mistake you make is to replay your blooper reel incessantly with the occasional quick glance to focus on someone else’s highlights reel.  You fuel your inner narrative that you are not now, nor will you ever be, as good as (insert Harp Hero here).

This is pointless and silly and you need to stop!  Next time you are in the presence of a Harp Hero – really listen.  It was incredibly freeing the first time I heard (and did not dismiss) my Harp Hero’s musical diversion – it helped me see that we are alike.  Ok, we are separated by years of experience and practice – but underneath all that – we both have bloopers and highlights –

So the next time its Bloopers Showtime in your head, make some popcorn and watch your “Funniest Home Videos”.

Then practice and gain experience – because you never know whose Harp Hero you might be!

Get some exercise – three good reasons

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As the winter comes, we want to burrow in, swaddled in sweaters, nursing steaming cups of lovely tea.  And we’re likely, given the chill, to get some practicing in which is good given that ‘tis nearly the season and we’ll be asked to play more often.  The days are shortening, the nights getting deeper.

It would be easy to crawl back under the duvet, to snuggle in to our beds.  But all that snuggling and all that nestling needs to be combated.  For your general health and well-being you need to get a little exercise and some fresh air*.  And a little exercise and fresh air won’t be amiss in your playing either.

We’re not talking about running a marathon or training for the World’s Strongest Man competition.  You can just go for a short walk to gain a benefit.  There are three good reasons to get a little exercise this season:

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  1. The simple act of taking a walk outdoors in the winter will help lift your mood.  Evidence suggests that even 10 minutes of sunlight a day can help stave off seasonal affective disorder.
  2. A little time outside can invigorate you (and thereby, your practicing).  Think of it as a little wake from your potential long winter’s nap! A short walk can enhance your energy (again directly contributing to your practicing).
  3. A little extra exercise will also help exorcise those extra cookies that appear in the season and allow you a small measure of perceived virtue! And everything you do to take care of yourself will be reflected in your time at the harp.

So use these three good reasons to get a little light exercise outside, even as the winter deepens and the cold settles in – you’ll be glad of it when you sit at your harp – to practice, to share or to perform.

* Of course, this is not medical advice, nor should you pursue this approach if it is in direct contradiction to advice received from your physician.  This post is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease. Duh.

You are what you think. Now get ready to change your mind.

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How do you think about yourself as a musician? A harp player? A performer? A person? Do you ever think about how what you think about you impacts the you that is present?

Are you open and accepting of yourself? How do you talk to yourself? Would you talk to anyone else that way?

Many of us talk to ourselves in a very negative way. But here are 7 ways to turn that around:

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  1. Make time during your practice to provide constructive feedback
  2. Make kind and gentle feedback comments to yourself in a positive way
  3. Write down your feedback….and read it again later
  4. Record yourself so you can provide more objective inputs at a later time and from a different perspective
  5. When you are not very nice to yourself, stop, correct yourself, and restate your thought in a positive, constructive way – the way you would to another person
  6. Take your time not only observing yourself and the way you think, but also to reconstruct the kernel of the original message in a positive and useful way.
  7. Lather, rinse, repeat!

You can change your mind by practicing reframing your comments to yourself.  And it will get easier…with practice!

Sorry to be late…

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Sorry to be late posting, I am having a bit of an emergency.  Travel, focus, caring, fatigue, etc.  You’ve all had emergencies, so you know.

I did think to grab my little harp on the way.  I spend so much time teaching and writing and arranging and practicing and blahblahblah, that I sometimes forget that I really enjoy playing my harp.  It not only provides distraction and pleasure, it adds a soothing balm at the end of a hectic day.

I’m not spending a lot of time with it but, like my good friends, it is there at the end of the day, waiting to provide it’s own form of help.  It assuages my heart and quiets my thoughts.

Don’t forget why you fell in love with your harp.  And don’t wait for the universe to prompt you to remember.  Go play, and enjoy, and don’t ever let the mundane everyday suck the joy from your relationship with your harp.

Basking in the glow

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Summer is a wonderful time.  Not only is the sun shining and the warmth of the days calls us to spend more time in that glorious light, but perhaps more importantly…it’s festival season!

I am basking in the afterglow of participating in the Somerset Folk Harp Festival in a summer full of enjoying the thrill of the middle of the summer Games and Competitions season, while getting ready for this year’s Harp Camp, and gearing up for the Harp the Highlands and Islands tour for this year*. Picture1

Summer is just chock-a-block with great opportunities to learn, to play, to meet new friends, to see old friends, and to just enjoy our music!  I hope you have had to occasion to avail yourself of the discovery, the camaraderie, and the pure joy of making music.

Summer is fleeting though and soon we’ll be in the bitter cold of winter when there are fewer opportunities to get together, time will be spent alone, practicing for Christmas gigs, and the shortened days seem to suck some of the joy from the day.  With the waning daylight we will miss the carefree days of playing through the summer.

Find your opportunity to join with others, to make music and have fun!

*there’s still time – if you want to get in on this year’s Harp the Highlands and Islands tour, get more information here or send me an email.

Take it slow

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Why are we so impatient with ourselves?  We are always sure that other people are having an easy time of it, but really, we all struggle from time to time – with a technique, with a phrase, with a tune, with reparation for a gig.

But really – why are we in such a hurry? You might think we’d rather slow down and enjoy the time at our harps, but instead we pressure ourselves.  We can really work ourselves up.  Sometimes we pressure ourselves right out of enjoying playing!

So, how can you tamp that impatience just a little, and in the process not only learn more and play better but also enjoy your time on the bench more?  Here are 5 things you can do to be more patient, take things more slowly, and likely play better:

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  1. Set a goal.  I know, you’re probably tired of hearing me say that, but it really does help.  Goal setting will allow you to make a schedule (even if it’s notional) and then you can be sure that you have enough time to meet your goal.
  2. Part and parcel to the goal setting is to write it down!  In addition to capturing your goal, you can capture your progress in a journal.  Your journal can be written or audio – the form is not as important as being able to gauge your progress.  In addition, reviewing your journal will help you get through those times when you are only focused on how far you have to go rather than how far you have come.
  3. Be positive – you will get there…how long and how easily is directly related to the time and effort you put into getting there.
  4. Practice patience!  Like everything else, becoming more patient with yourself, allowing yourself to take the time you need to attain your goal, requires practice.  Don’t be disheartened if you slip, don’t give up if things don’t look like they are going well.  Enjoy the journey in anticipation of the destination!
  5. Be kind to yourself.  Talk to yourself as you would a good friend – give yourself encouragement to continue and permission to develop.

Spend the time you need to become the harper you want to be.  Be patient.  Take it slowly. Do the work…and reap the reward in good time!

Time to act

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Its about that time – we’re a little over half way through the year.  That makes it a great time to review how you are progressing toward your goals for this year.  You’ve had plenty of time to forget your resolutions, to have slid off your goals, to need to be gently reminded of where you wanted to go this year.

Back in January I suggested you do these six things:

  • Write it down
  • Think first
  • Focus
  • Keep your space neat
  • Make a habit
  • Develop a ritual

So, how are you doing?  If you’re making progress – congratulations!  Keep it up and you’ll have a really productive year.

If you’ve “fallen off the wagon” you have plenty of time to get back on course.  Review (or actually set) your goals, identify the specific steps to get you there, and then schedule time for yourself to perform those steps.  And within the year, you’ll have done really well and made progress!